I often wonder how my kids will look back on their childhood. What will they remember? What experiences will they have no memory of? Of course, like almost any parent, a great deal of my time, money, and effort is spent on trying to "create positive experiences" for my kids. But sometimes I wonder which experiences they'll cherish and which will be forgotten soon after the experience.
What triggered this line of thought is that a touring production of my favorite musical, Jesus Christ Superstar, is passing through town soon. Of course I was going to go, but my kids (aged 12, 8, and 6) jumped up and down and begged me to take them along. Now, usually, when I go for concerts and shows, I don't include the kids simply because I just don't think the huge ticket prices are worth paying for little kids who won't get as much out of it as I would. But, since my wife had no interest in the show and I usually hate going alone, I asked her if I should take the kids. She shrugged and so I went and picked up four tickets to the show at $50 a piece. As I was signing the credit card receipt for a massive $200, I wondered whether it was good use of the money. Is it worth paying $50 for a 6 and 8-year old kid to see a show. A month or two ago, I paid $100 for a ticket so my 12-year-old could join us for a Blue Man Group concert.
When I think back to my childhood, most of my memories are of vacations or trips where something scary or bad happened. I remember being completeky impressed with the way my Dad handled the situations and being so thankful that he was there to protect us from horrible things that happen to us. I remember an incident where we were stopped at a light and a guy behind us (who we must have cut off) walked over to our car, leaned through the window on the passenger side (where I was sitting) and punched my Dad repeatedly in the face. I recall sitting there petrified as the sunglasses on my Dad's face broke. I remember berating myself for months after thinking that I should have just opened the car door hard to push the guy on to the road instead of just sitting there and letting this bum hit my Dad. I frankly can't remember any specific movie or show I went to with my parents. I'm sure I did ...
On the other hand, perhaps the kids not recalling the details of this specific show years down the line is not important. Perhaps it will add to their collection of experiences and emotions of things they did with Dad. Maybe there are short-term benefits of them seeing a professional Broadway production (all of them now have acted in local plays) that don't necessarily need to translate into some long term memory. Which then brings us back to the opening question, is it worth occasionally spending $200 for one evening of entertainment? Or will it actually "spoil" the kids into not realizing how much money that really is?
1 comment:
I have specific memories of trips and events from around 8 or 9, but mostly I think these things have a cumulative effect. It won't be just that one concert or football game that they remember. They'll have memories of the totality of their experiences with you.
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